Pets Write Bad Love Poetry for Valentine's Day

Kitten with heart pillows
This kitten is a poet and didn't even know it. (Sorry, we know you just did a face palm.)  

Ah, love is in the air. Valentine’s Day is almost here and we’d like to think that your pets are dreaming up some sweet things to say to that special someone in their life (you, of course). And what better way to express his undying devotion than a carefully crafted poem?

We asked our Facebook fans and fellow editors to unleash their inner romantic and write a poem from the perspective of their dog or cat — the cheesier and funnier the better! Get ready for some silly sonnets, pun-filled parodies and hilarious haikus.

From Our Facebook Fans

This take on the classic Valentine's Day poem is both heartwarming and hilarious:

Roses Are Red
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I love the toys for me to chew.
If I don't get one,
Your flip-flops will do.
I love the treats,
You let me eat,
And also your food,
Always puts me in a good mood.
I love the walks we take down the road,
It's always nice to lighten my "load."
I love the pets and tummy rubs,
It is you who makes me feel so loved.
— Submitted by Mary Fleming

Aw, we had to include this adorable rhyme:

Will You Be My Valentine?
Mommy dearest,
New mom of mine,
I love you all the time,
You are my perfect valentine.
Woof, woof, Harley.
— Submitted by Nancy Sutton Jordan

In Which Our Editors' Pets Take on Shakespeare, Frost and Sting

Sing this one to the tune of “Every Breath You Take” by The Police.

Every Bite You Take
Every bite you take
Every piece of steak
All the bread you break
And the meals you make
I’ll be watching you.

One of Shakespeare’s most famous sonnets, reinterpreted by a dog:

Sonnet 18
Shall I compare thee to my favorite prey?
Thou art more lively and commensurate.
Rough winds do shake the tall trees today,
And squirrel! I shall catch it. I’m not too late.

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